It has been a while since I last blogged :)

Let's talk about something serious.

Recently, I felt very tired. Who was not? Somehow, I find that CCA takes a lot of time but you have no choice cuz you really want to stay in campus or else, you have no other home. I have also learnt that it is possible for a person to have 1 hour of sleep to go through the day but not the next day. Many quizes in a row are common for uni.

But what I have been worrying about more is the majoring.

I always thought that I wanted to come here for Acturial Science. But I do not think so anymore. Chatting with a senior in that course made me feel that maybe I am really not up to it. He is the maths kind of person but even he finds it difficult. Not to mention his stats was A+.

If I do not take that course, what is left for me?

I know, people always love this sentence, "Choose what you like'. Like hell I have anything I like. Mkt sucks, HR not my thing, Tourism no. What is left is Banking and finance, IT.

Banking and finance... I guess it is ok. The only problem I have with it is the retrenchment. I really do not want to be out of work during an economic crisis. And it is a hell load of things to remember. All the theories and formulas.

Or I can try to apply into accountancy which I really have no interest in. But if you look at the career prospective, every company needs accountant. So, it is a little safer in a sense. Furthermore, the fact that so many people had passed the professional exam, it means that it is doable. The only thing is that I have no interest and alwasy find it a torture. But if I really want to change, I need to apply NOW!!! Cuz it is difficult to change to ACC.

What I really like. Econs. Honestly. But why did I take BUS instead? Cuz Econs is a bad degree according to the elders.

Do I suck or what?

ps: Sis, leave your comment in this entry if you read it...

There is something that has never occurred to my mind ever since I step into this uni. Maybe it is really my ignorance and my naïve and simplistic perception of the world. Even if I am in uni, I might not be able to graduate with a cert. I know, I know. It feels like, "You mean you did not know this or even have this thought in your tiny little brain!!!"

So, uni life is a lot tougher than SPM, A levels. Cuz both of that, you keep practicing and you will be able to somehow figure it out and you sill know the sample answer. Lol. Like Chem. Haha. But in uni, it is different. I do not even know how to do the questions. Plus, there is no discussion on questions like the exam questions in tutorial. Excepts perhaps Stats and Econs.

Whoever said life in uni is fun? Sigh... In fact, A levels was better.

Since I was worrying about my hall in NTU. Guess what? Worry no more.

I got Hall 10.

Features

1. Dad says that I get to exercise a lot, thanks to my new hall cuz it is furthest away from the NBS and nearest to the entrance/exit. Glad that I can go out anytime.

2. Next to the under construction Hall 11. Not to mention NBS is next to an under construction site.

3. All buses passing there are leaving NTU. Those that are coming in needs to go a big big round before getting to NBS. So I can get a good view and relaxation before going NBS. In fact, I can have more time thinking about business when I am changing bus. Or I can get more exercise walking to the bus station.

4. Surrounding only has one canteen. Good for me, I do not have to think so much about food and worry where to eat.

5. Everywhere else are houses. So, I will get a homey feeling.


I am so exalted with the given choice. So extremely excited to see my hall and get into uni life. So eager to go around my campus.

Glad that I do not have to be bothered by appealing for a new hall cuz it is not allowed. At least, less one thing to think about.

NBS students should walk more cuz they need to keep up with the fast-paced business world. Eng. students should be given a break cuz they deal with lots of calculation. Their brains are tired.

It will be a great combination if I were given the sixth floor of the furthest block. It will be a perfect settlement.

i am so so lost. not sure if i want to take up actuarial science. or something else. well.

option 1

apply for UTAR actuarial course and then do their 3+0 here. which is very very cheap compared to all the 2+2 in US. but UTAR... it seems like i have wasted my time doing A levels in SG then. cuz i could have taken up the foundation in UTAR and head straight into the course. unless you want to advice, 'take it as an experience'. sigh... NTU offers actuarial too but you have to compete for the placing depending on your first year results on stats and prob... haha. seems like my chance is bigger in UTAR, huh? not much, just slightly bigger depending on who is in the course. furthermore, their intake is in may! wth! meaning i have to apply asap!

option 2

go for the 2+2 in HELP, INTI, UCSI, Taylor's. sm told me that she is paying RM 60 000 per annum for tuition fee alone in US. like i can afford it?

option 3

wait for NTU's response and if i cannot make it, go for other courses. but NTU offers exemptions for the UK paper. 8 papers! if you do well, of course. UTAR does not since they are following the US board. but UK board does 15 papers while US board does 10 papers to complete the whole thing!

i am really at lost now. should i even take this course. the percentage of people passing is 30 to 40% for the UK board.

UTAR is not exactly really famous since it is new. i think 4th year? imagine a degree in actuarial in UTAR compared to marketing in NTU. hm...

and studying in UTAR = stuck at home.

and seeing cy who i never never wanted to meet anymore. she is just... argh!

or maybe i should just go for psychology in HELP.

what should i do?

people keep saying depends on your interest! wth. i do not know what i will be learning how can you say depends on my interest?!

i do not want to waste my life in actuarial if i cannot make it. since sm also says it is difficult. the teacher in Kumon who did the course says it is difficult but if you are not lazy and willing to work hard... this means i am going to study for my entire life. sigh.

and if i am really doing this, i should go UTAR cuz it is cheap and i pay 10% of the actual fee for the professional exams, the 10 papers since MY is a developing country.

tried looking for the price of the exams but cannot find! argh!

i am really lost... T.T

this friday...

should i say i am starting to be nervous despite of all the things i posted in my previous entry?

i am not sure.

cuz now i found a reason why i must get good results and be accepted in the uni there.

cuz that is my only ticket out of here.

as stupid as it sounds...

and i am scared.

if i really fail my GP. which i was pretty sure right after the exam.

and imagine the feeling of getting a B, that you might start to wonder if it was a high B.

but all these are over.

the most important thing is that i need to get out of here...

since many people are worried about that day, i shall be worried too.

it is not really surprising that i am not worried at this time.

not cuz i can get perfect score... duh. do i look like i am that kind of material?

but cuz well...

1. it is over, just take it! or you can choose to be so worried that you screw up your only holiday after the two years, and still face it.

2. i got stuff to worry about like how to get a bus ticket in such a short time... T.T and when will they announce the date so that i can apply leave from work?!! [ok, maybe some people does not need to worry about this...] and where am i staying?

3. i am still going to uni or college after this. either here or there. there will give me more freedom and less money. here i will have slightly more money but less freedom... hm... but here, i have aSh, reg, cl... and :p but less cute foreign guys... hehe. anyway, in conclusion, i will still continue on with life.

the only thing about taking this result is to know if my a bit of hard work at the last minute paid off [cuz i know there are people out there who are much much more hardworking than me [who comes into your mind? :D], wait, i think everyone else are more hardworking than me, but luckily they influenced me :D before it is too late [i hope...], like the day before a levels or it will be a lesson for me to work harder. T.T

another thing is the course i will be accepted in.

well, why not do your degree here and continue masters there? if you are willing.

ok, this entry is for mediocre like me... so if you are admitting that you have average results like me, you can continue reading, if not, just laugh your head off at how no ambition [is there such word : ambitionless?] and simplistic this lady can be. hehe.

my boss's daughter-in-law told me that there is one of the most expensive country to take a degree programme.

although i have to admit their courses are much wider than here. like you have to take science for a business degree. hm... nicely put, it would be holistic. another way you can say it is kiasu.

cuz there is no point in taking just one sucject on chemistry, right? it is not going to end up anywhere when 98% [random large number, as long as it has the effect :p] of what you study is accounts and the 2% is biology... god knows if you can even become a biology teacher in secondary school.

anyway, about the results... at worst, i would be embarrassing my family and myself if i get bad results. and i cannot say that i sure can get ok results cuz i am quite pantang this kind of thing. you never know... hehe.

and all the people who are watching me so that they can laugh their fat ass out when i fall, go ahead. just make sure your children do not get into a worse situation. cuz that time, i will be laughing my fat bum + thigh + tummy + baby fat out :p

while for people who put so much hope in me, first part of all, you do not know how it is like, you just think it is easy, well, the fact that i slacked so much is partly my fault too, but if i disappointed them, aww... sorry is all i can say. after all, i have nothing to do with you people, why are you so worried about me! give me stress only. but really...

as for my parents, ah, they always say it is ok. so, it is ok :D [pity my parents for having daughter like me :p better shang a char siew than me, at least they can eat char siew :p]

plus i always think that parents who put too much hope in and demand from their children are doing so cuz they themselves cannot achieve it. well, if you cannot, why force your children to walk the path that you wanted to walk on? let them be them. just like they might like art or music... i learnt that from dad; he told me so.

so, for people who are worrying... go ahead, just do not influence me :D

joking.

there is more to live. [i hope :p] if not, listen to stacie oricco's song entitled 'there's gotta be more to life'. [although i do not know the lyrics :p]

ps : very addicted to the chinese old songs from the 50's :D

asean dance was not bad. other than the noise and the people and no food and painful heels and bad music... haha.